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KATG 2790: Arts & Culture

Running a marathon backwards; audio tattoos; IKEA’s ad/pregnancy test; Google Arts & Culture; Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle, Proud Mary, The Post, The Commuter, and Molly’s Game reviewed January 16, 2018

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Show Notes

  • — WINNER: Keith decides to run the Boston marathon backwards
  • — Music To My Ears: Tattoo shops now offer audio tattoos – tattoos that make noise from your smartphone
  • — Fingers Crossed: IKEA offers a discount on cribs to pregnant moms after they urinate on an ad/pregnancy test
  • — Google Arts & Culture: An app tells you what famous art you resemble
  • — At The Movies: Keith explains how Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle was created to help teach autistic children but grown adults didn’t realize this and fell in love with it, and he reviews Proud Mary, The Post, The Commuter, and Molly’s Game

Pictures

Audio tattoo
Audio tattoo
IKEA's ad/pregnancy test
IKEA's ad/pregnancy test

Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle
Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle



Molly's Game: real Molly and fake Molly
Molly's Game: real Molly and fake Molly

KATG 2789: The Claw

with Subhah Agarwal – Hawaii’s ballistic missile attack; Sam Rockwell’s SNL F-bomb; Pittsburgh kicked out of NFL playoffs; President Trump comments on shithole countries; Trump paid off over 100 women that alleged sexual assault; Pornhub honors MLK; Time’s Up: Aziz Ansari, James Franco, Eliza Dushku’s stunt coordinator, Woody Allen, and Stan Lee; Liam Neeson calls Time’s Up a witch hunt while Chris Mathews jokes about drugging Hillary Clinton’s water with a Cosby pill; for reshooting All the Money in the World with Christopher Plummer, Michelle Williams was paid $1,000 while Mark Wahlberg was paid $1.5 million; The Cranberries lead singer Dolores O'Riordan died January 15, 2018

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Show Notes

  • — Happy Day: We have hilarious guest Subhah Agarwal in studio
  • — Go In The Water: An emergency alert mistakenly warning of an incoming ballistic missile attack was dispatched to cell phones across Hawaii
  • — Fuckadilly: Sam Rockwell accidentally dropped the F-bomb during a Saturday Night Live sketch
  • — No Hole In One: The Pittsburgh Steelers were knocked out of the NFL playoffs by the Jacksonville Jaguars
  • — Asshole Mouth: President Trump recently referred to Haiti, El Salvador, and some African nations as “shithole countries” in a meeting regarding immigration
  • — Non-Disclosure: Porn stars Jessica Drake and Stormy Daniels, as well as over 100 women according to Steve Bannon, were paid off by Donald Trump for sexual assault claims
  • — Interracial: Pornhub honored Martin Luther King Jr. Day by putting a picture of him on their landing page
  • — The Claw: A woman named Grace came out with allegations of sexual misconduct against Aziz Ansari
  • — Put $100 On Franco: Multiple women are coming out with allegations against James Franco. One of the allegations include removing protective covers from his co-stars' genitals when performing fake oral sex on them during movie scenes
  • — Childhood Stuff: Actress Eliza Dushku has accused a famed stunt coordinator Joel Kramer of molesting her when she was 12-years-old filming True Lies
  • — Do The Right Thing: Actress Rebecca Hall donated her salary from the movie A Rainy Day in New York, directed by Woody Allen, to the #TimesUp movement
  • — Just Hire A Hooker: Marvel creator Stan Lee, 95, is accused of groping nurses and demanding oral sex in his home shower
  • — Some Bits Don’t Land: Liam Neeson is saying that Time’s Up is a witch hunt and that the forceful allegations against Dustin Hoffman aren’t that serious, while newsman Chris Matthews made a public joke before interviewing Hillary Clinton about slipping a roofie in her drink
  • — Lean In: Mark Wahlberg will donate the $1,500,000 he was paid to #TimesUp following outrage about the wage inequality between himself and Michelle Williams, who was paid $1,000, for the reshoots with Christopher Plummer in All the Money in the World
  • — Was It Tanks And Bombs?: The Cranberries lead singer Dolores O'Riordan has died suddenly at the age of 46
  • — Can’t Tell Crazy From An App: Subhah gives an update on her non-love life

Pictures

Subhah Agarwal
Subhah Agarwal


Sam Rockwell
Sam Rockwell
:(
:(
Riot horses
Riot horses
The Donald
The Donald
Trump Hotel in Washington D.C.
Trump Hotel in Washington D.C.
Steve Bannon
Steve Bannon
Stormy Daniels, porn star paid off by Trump
Stormy Daniels, porn star paid off by Trump
Jessica Drake, porn star paid off by Trump
Jessica Drake, porn star paid off by Trump
Long live the King
Long live the King

Aziz Ansari
Aziz Ansari
Aziz's moves
Aziz's moves
Christopher Plummer
Christopher Plummer
James Franco
James Franco
Violet Paley, James Franco accuser
Violet Paley, James Franco accuser
Ally Sheedy, James Franco accuser
Ally Sheedy, James Franco accuser
Eliza Dushku
Eliza Dushku
Joel Kramer (r.)
Joel Kramer (r.)
Jamie Lee Curtis
Jamie Lee Curtis
Rebecca Hall
Rebecca Hall
Stan Lee
Stan Lee
Liam Neeson
Liam Neeson
Dustin Hoffman
Dustin Hoffman
Chris Matthews
Chris Matthews
"What if I drugged you and raped you lol?"
"What if I drugged you and raped you lol?"
Mark Wahlberg
Mark Wahlberg
Michelle Williams
Michelle Williams
The Cranberrys' late Dolores O'Riordan
The Cranberrys' late Dolores O'Riordan

KATG 2788: 10th Annual KATGuh Awards

The 2017 KATGuh Award Nominations January 12, 2018

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Show Notes

  • — Rockear El Voto: Keith and Chemda are ready to announce the 10th annual KATGuh nominees
  • — HEAR YE! HEAR YE!: KATG announces an entirely brand new podcast: My Opening Line
  • — Most Ridiculous Moment: Andy Kindler – Earth Corn People; Keith and Daniel Hartley – Silent Smoke vs. Yelling Coke; Keith – SEO; Keith – Kilgrave’s Thoughts
  • — Best Fight: Keith vs. Cathryn Lavery – Cat Murdering Keith; Keith vs. Cathryn Lavery – The Consummate Host; Chemda vs. Michael – Jailbird
  • — Most Touching Moment: Chemda – Can Chemda Still Sing?; KATG w/ Dustin Noack – Family Sex Play; Keith – Keith’s Alcoholic Apology
  • — Best Impression: Andy Kindler – Andy’s Mother; Chemda – Chemda as Christi Chiello; Hennessy – The AA Member; Kenny DeForest – Kenny as Bill Burr
  • — Most Shocking Moment: Keith – Keith’s Relapse; Chemda – Arrested Development; Chemda – Chemda’s Fart; Keith – Keith’s Divorce
  • — Best Spin-Off Episode: What’s My Name – Living in the Foster Care System w/ Chanel Ali; My Name Is Keith – The Studio; What Do We Do Now? – A DIY Christmas; WHAT’S UP, A? – Hoarders; Movie Night – Gremlins w/ Andrea Allan and Emily Lubin
  • — KATG.com/app: Keith tries to calmly explain the beauty of the Keith and The Girl app

Pictures

The 10th Annual KATGuh Awards
The 10th Annual KATGuh Awards
MyOpeningLine.com
MyOpeningLine.com







Andy Kindler
Andy Kindler
Daniel Hartley
Daniel Hartley
Cathryn not Malley
Cathryn not Malley
Michael Khalili
Michael Khalili
Peyton Clarkson
Peyton Clarkson
Dustin Noack
Dustin Noack
Christi Chiello
Christi Chiello
Hennessy
Hennessy
Kenny DeForest
Kenny DeForest
Bill Burr
Bill Burr
Chemda's fart
Chemda's fart
Chanel Ali
Chanel Ali
Andrea Allan
Andrea Allan
Emily Lubin
Emily Lubin
KATG.com/app
KATG.com/app

KATG 2787: The Seven Month Itch

with Hannah Boone – Drugs, rehab, and hallucinations; art teacher fired for teaching nude art to 6th graders; British Chef receives death threats for saying she spiked a vegetarian’s food with meat; husband sues wife for spying on his email after he catches his multiple affairs; Prince Harry’s presidential conundrum January 10, 2018

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Show Notes

  • — New Year, New Guest: Hannah Boone, the first new guest of the year, is in studio
  • — Cheaper Than Heroine: Hannah details her on and off history with drugs, rehab, and hallucinations
  • — Killing It: Hannah and her friend Morgan submitted their stand-up tapes to Keith and Chemda 7 years ago for the Open for Keith Malley stand-up competition, and Keith still has them
  • — Non-Teaching: Utah art teacher Mateo Rueda was fired for passing out library postcards that had artwork on them depicting nudity to a classroom of 6th graders
  • — Dead Meat: British Chef Laura Goodman stepped down after receiving death threats for bragging on social media that she put meat products in a vegan customer’s dinner
  • — A Confident Man: A Swiss man caught having an affair sued his wife on grounds that she invaded his privacy by reading his emails without authorization. He won, and she paid out over $14,000.
  • — Awkward: Prince Harry is avoiding questioning about inviting Barack Obama to his wedding as not to anger Donald Trump
  • — Start With A Plant: Hannah would like to be her mentally handicapped brother’s legal guardian

Guests

Hannah BooneHannah Boone

Pictures

Hannah Boone
Hannah Boone
6th grade teacher Mateo Rueda
6th grade teacher Mateo Rueda
Brown Odalisque
Brown Odalisque
The Valpincon Bather
The Valpincon Bather
Iris Tree
Iris Tree
Chef Laura Goodman and her meat-spiking restaurant
Chef Laura Goodman and her meat-spiking restaurant

KATG 2786: No Apologies

Steve Bannon apologizes; Golden Globes; Dustin Marshall and the end of Feral Audio; Ben Vereen and Paul Haggis, sexual abusers; revenge porn; Madonna vs. The Company Selling Her Used Panties; upcoming Grammy Awards January 9, 2018

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Show Notes

  • — Idiocracy: Steve Bannon made a public statement saying that he was mis-reported in the tell-all book Fire and Fury: Inside the Trump White House
  • — Emmy, You Get Emeralds: Keith reviews the winners and events of the Golden Globes, and Chemda is still thrown by award shows after 13 years of covering them
  • — 9 Lives: Feral Audio has been shut down because founder Dustin Marshall has been outed by his ex-girlfriend for being an abuser. Keith and Chemda go over his public non-apology, recount their experiences working with him, and discuss the launch of their new podcast
  • — Time’s Up: Broadway legend Ben Vereen has been outed for sexually assaulting at least 2 members of his cast in the 2015 production of the musical Hair. Writer and director Paul Haggis has been accused by 4 women of sexual misconduct, 2 of whom he raped.
  • — Revenge: Keith and Chemda review the law in regards to revenge porn
  • — Nude For The Very First Time: Online auction site Gotta Have Rock and Roll is in a lawsuit with Madonna over the business selling the star’s underpants, nude photos of her taken when she was 18, and a love letter from the late Tupac Shakur
  • — The Oscars Of Music: Keith reads the nominations for the upcoming Grammy Awards

Pictures


The President of The United States of America
The President of The United States of America
Steve Bannon
Steve Bannon
Paul Manafort
Paul Manafort
Michael Wolff, author
Michael Wolff, author
The Golden Globes getting political
The Golden Globes getting political
Allison Williams' bold choice
Allison Williams' bold choice
Tommy Wiseau getting snubbed
Tommy Wiseau getting snubbed
Dustin Marshall
Dustin Marshall
Abby Weems, Dustin Marshall's ex-girlfriend
Abby Weems, Dustin Marshall's ex-girlfriend
Ben Vereen
Ben Vereen
Kaitlyn Terpstra, victim of Ben Vereen
Kaitlyn Terpstra, victim of Ben Vereen
Paul Haggis, multiple rapist
Paul Haggis, multiple rapist
A Madonna auctioned photo
A Madonna auctioned photo
Ed Sheeran
Ed Sheeran

KATG 2785: TRON

Jon Snow aka Kit Harington was removed from an NYC bar; Keith’s odd landlord behavior; a pizza delivery service that shovels your driveway; Keith and Chemda invest in cryptocurrency; Donald Trump’s latest tweets; Jim & Andy: The Great Beyond reviewed; pirated movies January 8, 2018

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Show Notes

  • — Throne Out: Game of Thrones star Kit Harington was physically removed from Barfly in NYC for being drunk and disorderly
  • — Keith’s Roommate: Keith’s landlord shares the floor with him and Keith reveals the strange activities that have been happening
  • — 2 4 1: Michigan Restaurant Mario’s Pizza is offering snowed-in customers a “pizza and plow” special where for $30 the restaurant will deliver the pizza and shovel the customer’s driveway
  • — Cryptocurrency: Keith and Chemda detail their decision-making process in investing in the cryptocurrency TRON, and they share their plans for when they’re filthy rich
  • — Like A Dog: The gang reviews President Trump’s latest idiotic tweets including his FAKE NEWS AWARDS, him stressing his status as a stable genius, and his response to the tell-all book Fire and Fury: Inside the Trump White House by Michael Wolff
  • — Another Stable Genius: Keith reviews the documentary Jim & Andy: The Great Beyond
  • — Altruistic Thieves: The group calling itself Hive-CM8 distributed pirated copies of I, Tonya, Lady Bird, and Call Me By Your Name while stressing the importance of supporting movie theaters

Pictures

You're drunk, Jon Snow.
You're drunk, Jon Snow.

The Stable Genius
The Stable Genius







Other things that dogs apparently get done to them
Other things that dogs apparently get done to them





KATG 2784: Keith Malley is a Slut

with Mehran Khaghani and Will Miles – Keith’s updated looks; the benefits of psychedelics; forgiveness; witchcraft; sexual assault and free speech; social struggles; Dave Chappelle’s The Bird Revelation January 7, 2018

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Show Notes

  • — New Year, New Keith: Mehran Khaghani and Will Miles are in studio commenting on how fuckable Keith looks
  • — Trippin’: The gang discusses their time on acid and mushrooms and the lessons they’ve learned
  • — Family Ties: Mehran recounts his last conversation with his father before he passed away while Will’s father just finished his final round of chemotherapy
  • — The Priestess: Mehran sincerely discusses the benefits of witchcraft
  • — Echo Chamber: Mehran gives his perspective on the Louis C.K. allegations and its effect on free speech
  • — Atypical: Will discusses his struggles with socializing and how comedy helped him break out of his shell
  • — The Bird Revelation: Mehran tries to explain the hooker analogy that Dave Chappelle made in his last special

Pictures

Mehran Khaghani
Mehran Khaghani
Will Miles
Will Miles
Keith’s proficiency
Keith’s proficiency


Louis C.K.
Louis C.K.
Ben Vereen
Ben Vereen
Dave Chappelle
Dave Chappelle

KATG 2783: Yelp

T.J. Miller’s violent sexual assault allegations; Hoda Kotb replaces Matt Lauer on Today; local restaurant tapes negative Yelp comments on their bathroom walls; Keith and Park Avenue LASEK’s Dr. Chynn; doctor reuses disposable anal catheters January 4, 2018

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Show Notes

  • — Sexual Assault Pool: Keith and Chemda discuss the violent sexual assault allegations against Silicon Valley’s T.J. Miller
  • — Girls: Hoda Kotb joins Savannah Guthrie and replaces Matt Lauer on Today
  • — Ornella Trattoria’s Wall Of Shame: Keith and Chemda went to an otherwise classy restaurant that posts its negative Yelp reviews and the boss’s snarky responses on its bathroom walls
  • — I See You, Dr. Chynn: Keith’s scheduled eye surgery is postponed due to his doctor’s rude and unprofessional demeanor, and Chemda joins Keith in discussing the millionaire doctor’s odd public search for a bride
  • — Itchy: New Jersey doctor Sinjiv Patankar was caught reusing disposable anal catheters on his patients

Pictures

T.J. Miller
T.J. Miller
Christopher Plummer
Christopher Plummer
Today hosts Hoda Kotb and Savannah Guthrie
Today hosts Hoda Kotb and Savannah Guthrie

Owner and clever Yelp responder Giuseppe Viterale
Owner and clever Yelp responder Giuseppe Viterale
The Wall of Infamous
The Wall of Infamous






Dr. Emil Chynn
Dr. Emil Chynn
Dr. Chynn's office dog and supposed runway model
Dr. Chynn's office dog and supposed runway model
Disposable anal catheter reuser Dr. Sanjiv Patanker
Disposable anal catheter reuser Dr. Sanjiv Patanker

KATG 2782: Heartache

Chemda has post-tumor complications; Black Mirror; woman carries artificial pump in backpack to stay alive; Donald Trump vs. Kim Jong-un; Keith’s foolproof Super Bowl bet; Welcome to the Jungle and Darkest Hour half-reviewed; Molly’s Game and I, Tonya’s true-life stories January 3, 2018

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Show Notes

  • — About Last Night: Chemda was forced to revisit the emergency room over apparent myasthenia gravis complications
  • — Dark Times: Keith and Chemda discuss Black Mirror
  • — Monkey On My Back: A woman walks around with an artificial pump in her backpack to stay alive
  • — Commander In Tweet: Donald Trump tweets a nuclear threat and small dick joke to Kim Jong Un
  • — Winning!: Keith explains his Super Bowl bet that will make him wealthy beyond his dreams
  • — Now Playing: Keith walked out of Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle and Darkest Hour, and he discusses the true-life stories behind Molly’s Game, Player X, and I, Tonya

Pictures

Our persevering host
Our persevering host
Star Wars surgical droid
Star Wars surgical droid

2 separate articles from Vulture
2 separate articles from Vulture
Selwa Hussain
Selwa Hussain

Great sports
Great sports
Matt Damon
Matt Damon

Tobey Maquire
Tobey Maquire
Tonya Harding and Nancy Kerrigan
Tonya Harding and Nancy Kerrigan

KATG 2781: Common Sense

Logan Paul’s dead body; Bronx fire started from stove; criminals and fake gifts from the police; 60-year-old saves unopened Christmas gift from high school girlfriend; Brooklyn woman loses legs recovering purse from subway tracks; New Year’s Eve on TV and new year resolutions; Apple has been sabotaging your old iPhones; the most common passwords; a dating up but it’s of people’s fridges; Bill O’Reilly’s fashion tip January 2, 2018

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Pictures

Logan Paul
Logan Paul
Jake Paul
Jake Paul
The Bronx fire
The Bronx fire
The 60-year-old dad that never opened the gift from the high school girlfriend
The 60-year-old dad that never opened the gift from the high school girlfriend
Jenny McCarthy
Jenny McCarthy
Andy Cohen and Anderson Cooper
Andy Cohen and Anderson Cooper
Kathy Griffin
Kathy Griffin
Not cool
Not cool
Mariah Carey got her tea
Mariah Carey got her tea

The Polar Bear Club
The Polar Bear Club
"DUHHHHHHHHHHH"
"DUHHHHHHHHHHH"
A little early in the lessons for wine?
A little early in the lessons for wine?
Duolingo's hidden agenda
Duolingo's hidden agenda
Proficient Keith
Proficient Keith

Keith's refrigerator
Keith's refrigerator
Would you date this?
Would you date this?
Bill O'Reilly
Bill O'Reilly
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